Waiting for Heaven

Last night I made a call to heaven

And asked to speak to God

Some angel put me on hold

And I've been waiting ever since

For a chance to speak to Jehovah

To spend some time with the Saviour

And complain, cry and whine

About all that ails me still 

I feel a pain in my head

That won't go away

There's a hole in my wallet

All my money's fallen away

I'm in love with a woman

But I can't get her to stay

I've got a job to go to

I don't much like the pay

I've got a line to heaven

Some angel's got me on hold

He says they've got a crisis

A plane crash in the Atlantic

Two hundred and fifty on board

Civil war in Syria, fracas in Iraq

Three thousand dead and gone

Maybe more by the morrow

Here I've got a mortgage due

And a boss who hates my guts

My daughter's got a tattoo

I worry it'll be a baby next

My son's found the booze

And he's got a girlfriend too

So I'd like to speak to God

But an angel's got me on hold

I'd like some time with God

I hear he's got all the answers

It’s the reason I’ve held on since

Though I'm a little angry now

I'll hold my peace a while

Till I get can get some time with God

To whine, and cry and complain

About all that ails me still.